Well, I wanted to share it with someone for so long, but I couldn’t! I am a 24-year-old woman, confused about my identity!
When I was in class 5, I got a crush on a girl sitting next to me in the exam hall. I didn’t know about the thing “crush” at that age but I somehow felt something good for that girl! So the exam was over and I never saw her again in my life!!!
In my life, there are so many female crushes of mine but I never approached anyone, because somehow I felt they are straight and homophobic. And obviously, I didn’t want any of them to get uncomfortable because of me! So I acted like I was straight! And I am acting continuously!!
I never felt anything romantic for a man, never!! I always feel romantic attraction to women! But the problem is not there. The problem is, I do not have any sexual attraction to women! But in case of romantic attraction, it is sooo strong!! I tried to fall for guys but I couldn’t!! I only can think romantic things with women but not sexually.
As I am getting older, my mom and dad are talking about my marriage and I started to think about my situation seriously! And what I found makes me feel so irritated, which is, I have sexual attraction to men but not romantic attraction! I can’t think about passing good times with a man. But with a woman, I would love to! I am soo confused!
The summary is, I feel romantic for a woman but not sexually. And I don’t feel romantic for a man but sexually I have attraction!
I am so sorry for a long story! Can anyone tell me about my identity?? TIA.
Source: BAH (Bangladesh Against Homophobia)