Still praying

Sexual orientation will not define you as honest or dishonest. You can be straight and honest or ‘Rainbow’ and dishonest. Previously I thought, as gay people reveal their sexuality (at least to the community), so they are honest. Also, I believed as they recognize themselves differently, so they are not looking for social acceptance like others. So I considered myself a proud member of this beautiful open-minded society.

I was wrong! But I am not saying that it was my foolishness. My way of thinking is always as much straight as much I am gay.

I thought as being in this Rainbow society is illegal in our country, which means our law is still backdated. Also, I thought, as being a lesbian/gay is prohibited in most of the religions, that means those religions were formed and are followed by some blind people. So I thought all the lesbians/gays prioritize logic over blind faith, so they must be atheists or at least agnostic.

God!!! I was wrong, because although I am a ‘hardcore’ lesbian, albeit I prioritize logic over blind faith, still I can’t disbelieve in Almighty, still, I say my prayer, and I remember I asked for a girlfriend to Allah during last Ramadan 🙂 I was sitting in front of my ‘Iftaar’ and supplicated to Allah, please help me to get out of this painful loneliness, please give me an honest girlfriend.

I cried in front of my creator like a child, and do you know what happened after that? I got my long-expected GF!!! I always complain to my girlfriend, you are possessive and dominating, but secretly I let her dominate me, I enjoy her domination, which gives me a sense of being loved and being cared for.

Anyway, I am writing today not to ‘show off’ my love to the community, I am a bit obsessed with my love story, that’s it.

Source: BAH ( Bangladesh Against Homophobia)

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